Corsican vendetta knife with floral detail
"may all your wounds be mortal"
English Cream Dachshund
François-Hubert Drouais, The Marquise d’Aigurandes - detail, (1759)
Honestly can’t wait for the 50 shades movie to normalize the manipulation of lower-level female employees. Can’t wait for the new wave of “consent is sexy” banners on the cover of cosmo. Can’t wait for teen girls to think that a controlling relationship is romantic. Can’t wait for sexualized violence to become increasingly mainstream. And most of all, I can’t wait for BDSM to be labeled a feminist revolution.
Between two consenting adults, I have no problem with BDSM. That’s their lifestyle, that’s their choice. What I really have a problem with is the shit writing, and absolute romanticism of degradation. I have seen women older than myself—-ones with life experience and healthy relationships—fawn over these books, unquestioning of content. I’ve seen girls my age swoon over the exploitation, believing in someway that the relationship between Ana and Christian is something to aspire to.
Christian isn’t a dom. He isn’t a master. He’s a control freak. He doesn’t want anyone else too look at Ana. He limits what she can eat, and makes her agree to go to the gym four days of the week—-complete with a trainer hired by him that reports back to him. He makes her dress to his tastes. He buys out the company she works for so he can “keep her safe.” He demands she changes her name, and shows up at her work to berate her about it. And when she tries to stand up for herself he verbally degrades her. When she uses a safe word during their session he doesn’t comfort her. No, the bastard broods, and punishes her with his mood. He only marries her for fear that she will leave, and when she is pregnant with his child he becomes angry and claims she did it on purpose.
That isn’t ‘the lifestyle,’ it’s blatant abuse. Ana is an object to Christian. She’s not her own person. She doesn’t have confidence or self worth…and when she does she attributes them to her abuser (who she claims she would die without.) How is that sexy? How is losing your identity romantic? How is giving up your dignity to a spoiled and violent man something desirable?
If I were dating someone, let alone intimate with someone who wanted to take away my liberties and dog me the way Christian does Ana people who care about me would be begging me to contact the authorities. Christian Grey is a fucking creep. The relationship portrayed in 50 Shades of Gray isn’t romantic, it’s dangerous. And BDSM has nothing to with that.
If people want an example of a healthy BDSM relationship, watch Secretary.
that is fucking xiaolin as shit right there
If football (soccer) was really like that, I’d be into it XD;
it bothers me that Kansas and Arkansas are not pronounced the same
I’m from the UK and I have been pronouncing Arkansas as Ar-Kansas my whole life
For all my non-american friends, Arkansas is pronounced ark-an-saw
sometimes i actually go on facebook and then
In light of the 50 Shades of Grey trailer coming out today, quick reminder that that book is about an abusive and controlling relationship, not BDSM.
Fanfiction (published or not) is important for women of all ages to explore gender roles and sexuality in a way that is less stigmatized and more accessible.
But do not do the BDSM community a disservice by calling the relationship described in the book a BDSM experience.
William Adolphe Bouguereau, Jeanne (Detail), 1888